Oh how long the breaks between hate mail are! But they’re back, with more spunk and spit than ever! Some battling me with their purchase power, others throwing words, but every single one of them flinging hilarity! I know you’ll agree…
The Hate Mail fight rages on!
6 thoughts on “The Hate Mail fight rages on!”
The world needs some original Christian hate mail, god damn it.
Christian hate mail is so stale. Every day I roll my battered and bruised body out of a warm comfortable bed to fire up my internet machine to see the new hate mail indignantly typed in by Christians. I enjoy the reasoned opinions of religious people who, after spending most of the night looking at porn, try to assuage their sins with impassioned screeds on sites like NormalBobSmth.com.
“Ignore the jism, Pastor Jones, look at this violent, nasty, blessed email I sent someone who does not believe like we do.” “Well done, pious Peter, you can sit on my lap after church tonight.”
Christian hate mail peaked about ten days after the internet was invented. It has remained on a plateau littered with misspelled expositions of why their god is just the keenest, that ramble like a drunken cowboy looking for a steer to stump train.
For too long now Christians have relied on threats like: “My loving god will throw you in a lake of eternal fire” or “You’ll be in trouble come judgment day, I’m telling god on you.” Christians need to abort those worn phrases before they endanger their ecclesiastical health.
Since I am magnanimous to my Christian brothers and sisters, I have listed a few biblical insults they can use when they really want to tear into someone whose opinions are not identical to their’s.
“God said: “Every living substance that I have made will I destroy” so what do you think she will do to you when she gets hold of you?” Genesis 7:4
“Come judgment day; do you really want to mess with a god, who was so excited about killing all the Egyptian firstborn, was also going to kill Mosses because his son was not circumcised?” Exodus 4:23 – 25
“God once smote an entire city’s male population, just think what he will do to you.”
1 Samuel 5:6-7
“You have as much chance of entering heaven as a man “wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off” has of being allowed in a church.” Deuteronomy 23:1
That is only a small sample of the excellent threats and curses that can be extracted from the bible to use for insulting people you don’t agree with. Use your bible, your imagination and your righteous hatred of everything you don’t like to add spice to your Christian hate mail.
I will leave you with a quote from Jonathan Swift:
“We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.”
I imagine it does get old quickly when it’s your team.
that hole,that nothing will fill,you try filling with what you think is witty and smart,isnt.it just shows how empty and debased you really are.
Learn to spell, Mr. Pepper. And stop using non sequiturs to argue your point. You bible-thumping loonies always do that. Learn some basic logic skills, then come back and make your point.
JEWS GAVE ME BUNIONS!!
How do these Jew-hating idiots manage to figure out how to use a computer?
Well gosh baptism Bruce, if your remark is directed at me, I am offended. I went through all the trouble to suggest witty, hateful put-downs from your holy book⚶ to use with people who don’t agree with you 100%; and this is the thanks I get?
I am a trifle concerned prophet Pepper, in light of your comment’s wording: (sic) “that hole,that nothing will fill…” If you’re closeted; come on over to the side of truth, justice and (what I wish was) the American way. What ever you do, don’t come out to your fellow religionists. They will hound you with vigor for your sexual practices.
Although homosexuality is as normal as being left or right handed, some religious people of rank have found it to be a persecution worth a pretty penny. As Hitler had the Jews to use for his benefit, so too do Christians have badgering of Gays, Atheists and other so-called fringe groups to vacuum money from the pockets of their vassals. Keeping the lumpen proletariat all hating in the direction distracts them from realizing their leaders have grown rich off their followers hard labors and credulousness.
Good luck, Bruce Pepper. I wish you peace & love in your on-going struggle with grammar.
(⚶ Many Christians rely on a lengthy tome of loosely related ancient documents commonly divided into two sections named the “Old” and “New” testaments. In fact, many call this book: the Christian “bible.” This “bible” is not as accurate as “The Indie [Music] Bible” or the “The Website Marketing Bible” nor as helpful as the “The Cannabis Grow Bible.” Originally a mish mash of oral stories by ignorant savages used remember their coolest hallucinatory experiences; the stories were written down after a few centuries. The book is now worshiped by the Christian sect of religionists as the word (albeit often contradictory) of their deity.
( ♯♪♪♫♩ Now you know. ♬♩♪♪ )
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