Category Archives: Dressup

Trump Dressup

The shipment of Trump magnets arrived today and they look amazing!
The shipment of Trump magnets arrived today and they look amazing!

Good Lord, I can’t believe they’ve finally arrived. I’m sure it appears as if I’ve stopped doing anything here at normalbob.com, but rest assured the only reason for the lag is to rest up before my latest project hits the market. And that’s today.
I give to you Trump Magnetic Dressup.

Do you have any idea what it’s like to have to wait for three months while your time-sensitive idea is being produced on the other side of the world? Watching the news not knowing if they’ll be rendered completely invalid or a huge marketing success by the time they get here? Well, it seems that day of reckoning  is finally here, and it looks like everything’s worked out okay.

Magnetic Trump Dressup ($15)
Magnetic Trump Dressup ($15)



 

So what’s sure to be the most mainstream project I’ve ever embarked upon, while at the same time probably losing me the maximum number of friends & fans, I have to tell you both the site and the magnetic version look amazing.

TrumpDressup.com image 2017
TrumpDressup.com image 2017

The online version of the game goes above & beyond the playability of any dressup I’ve produced before thanks to the partner I’m working on this with. I’m so pleased to say it can be played on your computer in all browsers,  tablets, smartphones, etc. so feel free to share it with your friends on social media. There’s also the additional Trump-speak feature which allows you to include Trump’s latest Tweet or anything you want him to say in with your dressup creation.

Trumpdressup.com Trump-Speak!
Trumpdressup.com Trump-Speak!

If you’re wondering why I have them for sale in both my regular Jesus Dressup store while also available at a Shopify connected to Trumpdressup.com, it’s because, like I said, I’m not pursuing this venture alone. I have a business partner to help with marketing, programming, finances and other things to make this a complete venture with maximum profitability. The only difference in these two stores is the option to include Jesus Dressup  magnets in with your Magnetic Trump Dressup order from my personal store. The cost to you and the amount that goes in my pocket from a purchase is the same.

I truly have no idea what to expect after this moment so I just suggest you buy your set soon because their days of availability are probably numbered. If you are a store who would like to have Magnetic Trump Dressup on your shelves, contact me and I’ll be happy to send you wholesale prices & availability.

And I suppose now’s as good a time as any to say thank you to my folks for letting me take residence in their home while I profit off mocking both their saviour and their president.
Thanks mom and dad!

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The Jesus Dressapp

UPDATE: Sept 25, 2016 – The Jesus Dressapp has been deleted from Google play, but is available, uncensored here at Evil Apps.

Jesus Dressup crownhanger logoIt’s here at last! The Jesus Dressapp for Android. But not without it’s share of drama… Already!
This is actually the 2nd version of this particular design posted within the last 48 hours. The first one removed for being too sexy explicit with the BDSM clothes. Those have now been removed. (btw, if you downloaded that first version you can still download the new one without disrupting the one you have. You’ll just have 2 versions on your phone.)

Jesus Dressup App for Droid samples
Jesus Dressup App for Droid samples

Anyone who’s followed the Jesus Dressup app story for the last 6+ years has witnessed the constant struggle to get it & keep it available to the public. And there’s a story to go with each desperate attempt made.

Jesus Dressapp Attempt #1

Apple FAIL image

The first big attempt was in 2010. A fan of the site from Scotland came to visit at Union Square. He offered to make the app for iPhone. He’d mentioned it when we met, hung out a few days without talking much more about it. Then I happened to be walking by him on Astor Place the day he was flying back home and he shouted from the distance, “Do you still want me to make that iPhone app for you?”

“Sure! Go for it! Just put a link to the fridge magnets on it and it’ll be worth it to me!” I shouted back.

Knowing it was a lot of work to make, in haste I said, “If you can put a link to my store on it it’s yours to do whatever you want with!” Or something of that nature.

Many months passed and I had already forgotten about it. Then low and behold he messages telling me it’s done and ready to go. I was impressed.

The next step was getting it approved by Apple itself, which much to my surprise they did! We were both visibly shocked and excited.  Unfortunately, the other thing I was quick to find out was he’d made the Apple account entirely under his name, and all purchases of the app were going to him. I’d been shut out of it completely. And there wasn’t even a link on it to promote the magnets I sell.

I called him and explained how this wasn’t an acceptable setup. He immediately got defensive, saying “You said I could have it if I made it!”
After several more minutes of angry words I told him if he doesn’t change the situation fast I would contact Apple and tell them he’d stolen my product and have them take it down. He yelled back at me “Fine! I’m taking it down myself!” And hung up on me. It was removed seconds later.
Then this guy from Krapps emailed me wanting the full story…

Jesus Dressapp removed banner

Jesus Dressapp Attempt #2

Attempt #2 happened about a year later (2011). Inspired by the acceptance by Apple from the previous attempt I started asking around for possible programmers. Having an iPhone App appeared to be a venture that could be quite lucrative. This time I’d pay someone to make it again, and I could have full control, beginning to end.

Union Skaters w/jesus dressup flyer
David, Shiva, Greg & Tom burning a hole through Jesus Dressup flyer

A friend of mine from Union Square, one of the skateboard kids I’d known since he was 15, was now going to school for programming. He was happy to figure out how to make an iPhone app while getting paid. It took the better part of winter 2010/11 and a lot of headaches, but after several months we had our iPhone App ready to go. We submitted it to Apple, and about a week later they rejected it. I tried to appeal the rejection but they didn’t care. I belly ached to them how they approved it a year earlier when it wasn’t me who submitted it, but they stood firm. “Too controversial.”
It was spirit-breaking.

In an amusing side note, below is the image they sent us with the rejection letter. And yes, someone on their end had to dress him up like that before concluding it was too offensive for Apple.

March 14, 2011 image included in denial email after contending the Apple app rejection.
March 14, 2011 image included in denial email after contending the Apple app rejection.

Anyhow, this particular rejection really took the wind out of my sails for a Jesus Dressup app any time in the near future. Having it approved for the guy who stole it, and rejected after putting so much time and money into it was the deathblow. Tom and I parted ways, and I didn’t feel like getting into app making ever again.

Jesus Dressapp Attempt #3

Then in 2013 I was contacted by a Facebook friend who said he wanted to make the Jesus Dressup app for Android. Let me say that he was making a very generous offer of doing it for no charge for the experience, and credit on the app itself. I warned him of the troubles in the past, the difficulty & time involved in making it, and the very real fact that it’s probably not worth it financially for either party involved. Still, he offered to do it while in school, for no pay.

A year later the progress had been minimal and I realized again, it was way too big a job to be worth doing at all. I seriously don’t know how making these free apps is worth it for anyone.

Jesus Dressapp Attempt #4

Finally earlier this year, around March, I was contacted by another Jesus Dressup fan, Mirko Bonasorta from Italy, offering to make the app for Droid as long as he could get named credit. I did the usual “It’s a bigger job than you think, and afterwards it’ll be rejected for being offensive” speech. But as long as his name could be credited for making it he was willing to give it a shot, no charge. He sent me video of how it’d play, and several months later it was done. That was last week.

Less than 24 hours later it was deleted from Google Play for being too sexually explicit. So we removed the BDSM option, and just in case we also removed the Nazi stuff from the Final Justice version, and now it’s back up. And that is where we stand.

Playthrough of the 2016 Jesus Dressapp for Android

It has almost every version of Jesus Dressup I’ve ever made included, it’s FREE, and it even has a link to my fridge magnets in it!
I have an iPhone so I haven’t played it yet, but after watching the play-through (above) I really wish I had a Droid instead. And the reviews it’s getting are astounding!

Jesus Dressapp Batman screenshot

“Even more fun in app form!”

“I have the magnet set, but now it’s on my PHONE! No more carrying my refrigerator around wherever I go”

“Hilarious”

Even more fun on app form. I love the magnets so the app is even better! I love the villains option, it’s my favorite! Easy to use and fun.”

“Instant classic. Brilliant”

So race to Play Google, download it before it’s deleted again, pass the link onto friends and write a nice review before I’m writing about the Jesus Dressapp 5th Attempt!
Just click on the link below. And if that one’s been deleted you can always get the completely uncensored one here at Evil Apps.

Jesus Dressapp for Droid on Google Play

News from Union

Amazing Strangers

Amazing Strangers Wendell icon

As you can see, I’ve been going through old footage again, realizing that I’ve not only got A LOT of it, but much of it is still very interesting! Quite honestly, there we’re many times at the end of a day at Union I’d go home saying to myself, “Not now, but this’ll be something I want sometime down the road.” So I expect to continue doing this for as long as I keep running across stuff I find interesting. Which reminds me, if you’re a musician and especially if you have music inspired by NYC, Union Square or Amazing Strangers, I’d love to use it in the videos I’m editing. Nothing inspires me to find more of this footage and post it up into creatively edited vids than music. I’ll give full credit and link you up if you got anything. Some of my best music vids were from fans who wrote songs inspired by what they saw on the channel.

Inna
Inna clean & sober April 2016

Big news that I thought I’d never be hearing I heard yesterday! Inna is clean and sober. Including alcohol. And she looks great. She insisted I spread the news that she’s super fucking hot now, and she says she’s never going back. Most of the time I’d take a claim like this with a grain of salt, but Inna’s always been pretty blunt about her drug and alcohol usage (among other things) and never before has she committed to cleanliness like she is now.

It’s been a year, and she told me to tell you “It takes pride to step out of the gutter.” And she’s through “acting bizarre and looking ugly.” I’m happy to hear this, and her latest photos speak volumes. You can see for yourself on her Facebook.

I spoke to Shaggy a few days ago and he tells me Union’s changed. It’s not the crazy madhouse it used to be in springtime. He thinks a lot of the people used to come to get filmed in some way or another, and the others came because of those. I don’t entirely think that can be judged this soon in the year, so I won’t believe it until I hear news like this when summer gets here. If however it’s true, it’s pretty shocking to me.

Jesus Dressup

This week my Star Wars Jesus Dressup (2nd printing) arrive and I’m terribly excited! Because of the sensitive nature of this product the image of them won’t be displayed in the store, and they’ll be listed as “Jedi Jesus” so as not to infringe on any copyright problems they could spark. I strongly suggest not waiting too long to purchase them for yourself, because the first printing of these sold out pretty quickly.

As for anything else, I still have no plans to return to NYC. I might be headed to Philly later this month, so if you know of anything out there I should take my camera let me know.

Last Day of March Recap

It’s been a long LONG horrible winter, but it seems to finally be ending. And even though it’s been pouring rain all weekend I can’t express enough what a relief even this wet and sunless 50 degree day was. Now, I’m sure any of you who’ve been regulars to the site for more than a couple years have noticed how things have slowed down here. Hate mail has ceased, everyone’s on their phones and the internet’s changed a thousand different ways in just the last 3 years. However that doesn’t mean I’ve gone away. Thankfully the Jesus magnets keep me in business, and it seems they might for the rest of my life. Let’s hope.

Unfortunately BDSM Jesus is completely sold out. The Jesus Christ Superstar set is almost gone (I think I have one or two more boxes of 40 left). And the Star Wars Jesus will surely disappear in 2014. I’d be getting more made immediately if my recent forced move hadn’t depleted all my holiday profits to the red. Believe me, as soon as I get it together I’ll be producing more, and I’d like to have the Batman ones by Christmas 2014, if you want them. Do you though?

“Batman WHAT?!?!” you say?! Yes! Batman Jesus is the latest of my JDU variations. I’m still up for additional costumes to the page if any of you Batman nerds out there have suggestions. Is there something obvious you think I’ve forgotten? Tell me about it! And before I get completely off the topic, if you know of a store in your area that’d possibly carry my product on their shelves, please tell me about that too.

Gigi Deluxe art
Gigi Deluxe in hitchhiking bikini digitized in Adobe Illustrator for dressup game

Other updates to the site – This winter I did a lot of drawing to maintain my sanity. So you can check out some of the sexy favorites I did in my portfolio, and everything else worth looking at is on Facebook, for now.

Also, you know that “Other” folder in your Facebook messages? The one you remember every couple years, and then when you do there’s shit there you wish you would’ve seen the year it was sent? Well, today I discovered another one of my hate mailers, Luke, sent an apology which appears to be one of his 12 Step requirements. I was actually touched, and I took off any and all personal information of Luke’s so you can see his email and he can move on. Sorry Luke that I didn’t get it sooner! Facebook really needs to ditch the Other folder. Does anyone really want their mailman guessing which letters are & aren’t important to us?

bitches don't know
“Bitches don’t get my style!” as he appears on the 2014 Matchgame Postcard

So a couple weeks ago I posted what I thought was a pretty average video of a guy we’ve all seen at the park swaggin’ around with a headset on for the last year or two. Then a couple days later, in the middle of the night, that video got 120,000 views on it! And now it’s up to 250,000 views, and I’m perplexed! I mean, I saw that it got on Reddit, and some other UK sites, then Gothamist picked it up after that, but in all truth I can’t wrap my head around why it’s such a big deal. I mean, Shaggy and I caught a guy shoplifting at Starbucks, and that video doesn’t even have 5,000 hits! And every time someone tries to explain it to me I STILL can’t fathom the craze! But perhaps you will. See for yourself.

Speaking of which, you know what else has been getting a lot of views seemingly out of nowhere? The Facebook page for Mohammed Dressup! Both Haters & Likers have been hittin’ it up, Liking and commenting on the wall… And that’s about it. No one’s buying the magnets as of yet, but I’ll take what I can get. There could be a point in the semi-near future where I conclude the Mohammed magnets are a complete bust and I’m the bonehead for thinking there’s an ex-Muslim subculture with internet access to appreciate them. Maybe they need a few more decades to see the humor in it all. All is not lost however. One of the few stores that carries them, Wacko on Hollywood Blvd just reordered another batch! So all is not lost. Isn’t “Draw Mohammed Day” coming up here in May? Maybe something can happen then?

As for everything else, the Amazing Strangers will be back at the Square soon enough.
I’m available for freelance work if you have art projects of almost any kind that you’d pay to have done.
Oh, and if you’re really a pro at coding, my dress up games need repairing! Firefox & Google Chrome did something to their browsers last October that deactivated the movable layers feature in my games. If you can figure out a fix besides the “use Safari instead” answer, I’ll pay for your services!

The fact that I still have any visitors to my site some 13 years later means a lot to me.
Your continued interest keeps it going. Now excuse me while I get ready to watch the latest episode of Cosmos.

Normal Bob Smith
bob@normalbob.com