Category Archives: Mohammed Dressup

Amazing Strangers Hate Mail!

There’s been a plethora of condemning words and scolding from my comments section on YouTube directed at your’s truly over things that have been happening at the Square lately. So many people are offended to find out that their comments might not be getting the respect they deserve from me, and they’re lashing out with personal insults, bold accusations and even threats to come kick my ass and smash our phones! So I thought maybe if I respond to this lengthy complaint letter I could clear up some of these misunderstandings, or confirm their vitriol.

Mr. Nobody’s Flickering Light

“Please don’t post my messages, or talk about it with your strangers, including your Shaggy…”

Subject: Circus

Please don’t post my messages, or talk about it with your strangers, including your Shaggy friend; I’d prefer to remain off the roster.

I’m ill and stuck in bed mostly, and have watched all of the Stranger videos. I think watching makes me feel iller, but I have some fascination, similar to seeing mosquitoe larvae swimming in a dirty puddle.

My general impression is that NYC must be heavily centered around cultures related to the performing arts. The strangers all share desires related to the spectacle. It seems obvious that many of the people you record from the steps are seeking you out, and putting on a show specifically because they’re aware of the camera.

Even social characters supposedly with psychological problems, like Dusty, seem to me to be clearly acting. But it is a blend with their personality, where their act isn’t entirely separate from their real persona. Which is partly why most of these people would be diagnosed with personality disorder.

It’d be interesting to go through the list of people and try to diagnose them to identify their specific motivations and dysfunctions.

But I hope you’re open to critical analysis pointed at you too, because it looks like you’re part of that same thing. Except, rather than being a trashy dysfunctional actor, you’re the director. Rather than be the spectacle, you play the quieter top-down behind-the-lens kind of overseer who puts the show together.

It’s a free public circus, and you claimed them as your freaks, to create a park of novelty and drama, that through the clearer defining of what already exists, you are able to brand in your name and essentially charge admission.

Except I looked at your numbers, and product, and you’re at the level of the bums asking for change. Which makes it interesting, because you’re kind of like a homeless director.

This gives you freedom, but what you do with that freedom is apparently build family with the mentally retarded and disorderly. Which makes your issue as interesting as theirs, because why would someone do that?

You apparently grew up in Christian land, so maybe when you were little there was tremendous desire to break out of that restricted lifestyle. Maybe that’s where you developed appeal for “punk”, and atheism. Maybe it is your own fetish, but you still haven’t been able to free yourself completely, so you find comfort in watching others do it for you, where you can pretend to be “normal”, when really you know you’re nothing of the sort.

Maybe in Christian land you felt like the freak, because compared to them you were. Maybe that bothered you, so you moved into a garbage dump, where relative to them, you’re Mother Theresa. But you’re also freer to act out, and embrace your inner punk.

But you’re an old man. Don’t you want a functional family? Are you married? Children? Did you escape a heart break when you ran away to the island of the freaks? Maybe you suffer from something similar to Shaggy. He seems to have a developmental problem where he is rooted in the persona of a 12 year old, along with low intelligence that might classify as mild retardation. You seem smarter, and more like 16, but still, similar in that you’re choosing to hang out in middle school for years.

It looks like maybe you started out with more documentation, and “freaking out squares”, which you learned can bring income with the magnets. You need to do more than sell some magnets, and shocking the world with trash TV is another opportunity to get attention, which really shows that you yourself are in the business of the spectacle, just like them.

But after a while you seemed to get really integrated into the native culture and it became your family, possibly even a main source of love. In the process, you create drama that wouldn’t exist, because you’re living as savages who are part of a family.

Like with Zippy, he clearly admired Shaggy, and that attraction to the love of the park family had him talking crazy of wanting to throw his life away for this tribe.

I feel the whole situation is being neglected. The park should be a facility built for the mentally ill, where qualified people are cleaning them up and preventing things like tooth loss and infection. They shouldn’t be brought to a hospital and released, they should all live there permanently. New York is really failing, in that they seem to leave wild wounded animals to infest the parks, only providing police to overlook.

One thing I can’t figure out is this:

This gem I never really talked about on the site. It’s moments like this that make me wonder if I’m the only one who totally appreciates what I do.

Describe what happens here to your buddy and he’ll look at you funny and say, “You subscribed to that channel why?”

In my eyes however, it’s a red ribbon.

It’s a video of you apparently mocking the dog molester guy. Put that together with your Christian bashing, and chuckles when Shaggy puts others down, and I’m wondering if your main motivation is to attack people. Is what you’re doing here to appreciate making fun of some guy where he sees it but doesn’t get it or whatever and walks away? To communicate with the wildlife through hand gestures? Is your red ribbon that you chased him out? Put down a retard and declare victory? Surely you’re not that stupid are you?

Maybe it has a lot to do with lust and love. Maybe the punk girl you fetishize is far more common there. Maybe the fleeting wins of catching the punk girl on camera, sometimes in states of undress, to have her coming to you confusing the attraction for the camera with attraction to you, opportunity to be close and interact with her, is worth much more than money to you. Maybe sometimes you have sex with them, maybe the masturbation material is enough, maybe you hold out on dreams one might bond with you.

Maybe you, like the rat in the hat, are under delusion that your production could be the next big thing.

Mister Nobody

misternobody@hush.com

MN,Well first of all, I don’t think there’s anything to fear in having your letter posted, or shared with Shaggy or anyone. I’ve never understood why people email me such rude & condemning letters, then prefix it with “Please don’t share this with anyone, or tell anyone what I’m saying, or tell them my made-up name!” You emailed me completely anonymous, then categorized me, in blunt detail, somewhere in-between a sad, lonely, old man and that guy who whipped the Elephant Man with his ringmaster’s baton. If I can take the public shaming, so can you. You’re just going to have to deal with it being posted for people to see.I will say however you did nail some of your descriptions of me on the head. I admit to my fascination with freaks, punk girls, and people living on the fringe all being directly related to the restrictions of my youth. Talking with my mom today she mentioned that my desire to plop myself down in the middle of such chaos probably has a lot to do with my struggle to be outgoing. By putting myself there people come to me. I know this is true. This also has a lot to do with why I enjoy Shaggy’s friendship so much. His ability to do and say things I cannot and his outgoing nature has always impressed me. I’ve said it before – these are parts of him I admire and would like to have rub off on me. Some of it has, and I am a better person because of it. Also, as a friend of Shaggy’s, you don’t know shit about him. I couldn’t hang out with someone for a decade if they weren’t smart. If you can’t see the cleverness in his observational skills & street-wise, then maybe it’s you who’s lacking something in the brains department?

In response to your more ugly assessments of me, I think you only reveal your own sad outlook while you are stuck sick in bed living life through YouTube videos. Instead of giving me any sort of break and considering that I’m attempting to be as honest as possible in these videos, like it or not, you assume most of my reasons are devious. What you see as “exploiting the retarded” or making fun of people with psychological problems, I see as showing real street life without sugarcoating or patronizing.

My main source of income is in the Jesus magnets, which is about 90% wholesale to stores across the US and worldwide, none of whom found me through my Amazing Strangers videos. I don’t know where you got your “charge for admission” accusation, or thinking I have some money-making agenda behind all of this. This probably reflects your perception of others (and in many cases, rightly so). However, anyone who actually knows me knows that money is not my first, or even my tenth motivator (I mean, I actually went and produced Mohammed Dressup fridge magnets! For profit?). There’s going to be no mainstream show from what I’m doing (too raw & politically incorrect). I put no ads on my videos, and charge nothing for anything I’m doing there. I actually lose money by making the postcards and giving them away, which I do because it’s fun, and I’m very proud of it.

Believe it or not the #1 motivator for me making these videos is because it’s a priceless truth-stranger-than-fiction diary of my daily experiences. The events that happen here are like nothing else, and documenting them is something only those involved can truly appreciate and understand. If you’re not at the park all the time like we all are, you’ll never fully get it. This fact is proven to me again and again in the comments section under the videos.

Anyone who actually comes to Union and experiences what’s happening there in real time immediately gets put in their place. You may have some grand solution for how we should be acting in each video, but the second your ass is there on the steps you’ll see how your ideas flop, and the way Shaggy and I handle ourselves actually works, and the lessons learned of value. The social experiment of it all should leave no question as to why it’s so interesting and so worth documenting.

When I first began my site I knew one thing I’d have to endure would be viewers assigning me the worst possible traits for why I’m doing what I’m doing, and then hearing their vivid analysis like it’s somehow so insightful. But since day one my main concern is not for what people on the internet think of me (a radical idea in today’s world), but instead only caring what people who actually know me in real life think. This is why my site has had such longevity (13 years), while others fail.

Having a wife & family has never been on my todo list. Expressing myself artistically I’ve found to be extremely fulfilling, and I’m having way too much fun being unmarried, kidless and free to change my mind anytime soon.

Thank you for your feedback, but next time please take into account your bedridden illness distorting how you perceive others before you put it all in print and hit “send.”

Btw, NYC is clearly not the city for you.

Normal Bob

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Welcome to NormalBob.com (the new Latest Updates location)

This winter has turned out to be the longest of winters I’ve ever spent away from the site. Not that I haven’t been able to keep myself busy, but it did in fact turn out to be a much needed break. Since October of 2000 I’ve not gone once without making some sort of content update at least every couple weeks. And on average, consistently updating it a couple times a week, for 13 years! But the internet’s changed drastically since then. One of the changes I’ve witnessed is there being less of a need for constant obsessive updates. Competing for continual content on the web is a no-win race, and can quickly lead to extreme burnout.

Happily, I can now confidently say that the struggle to maintain a significant flow of traffic is no longer necessary for me to maintain a stable income. The steady demand for Jesus magnets on store shelves has freed me from those worries. That’s what I’ve spent the last year working to guarantee. Cold calling stores, sending samples, and fulfilling orders has proved to be a very fruitful venture. Asking my Facebook friends for names of possible stores has done what in the past I thought impossible – A useful purpose for Facebook.

Have no doubt however that the site remains my pride & joy. I’ve got big plans for 2013. The one that’s in the forefront of my mind at this exact moment is the project I just put the final payment on this afternoon. The Prophet Mohammed Dressup magnet sets!

Mohammed Magnets & Postcards
Mohammed Magnets and Postcards ($30)

Seriously, the last time I felt this excited about a project was when I received the first Jesus Dressup magnet samples back in ’04. Earlier this week the Mohammed samples landed on my doorstep, and let me tell you, they are a sight to behold! If you see me on the street, feel free to ask to see it! I am one proud papa. And the new version of the online game (you’re dressing him in modern men’s fashions from Target & The Gap) is available for play immediately! There’s also Prophet Mohammed postcards available for purchase too. 100% legally mailable postcards that can be sent through the US Postal Service for just pennies a piece! No envelopes required so The Prophet’s image can be seen the whhhhhooooollle way! Across the nation and over oceans! I encourage you to get a pack for yourself to send your heartfelt wishes to friends, loved ones and anyone else you think might appreciate seeing the long lost Prophet. I’d also like to think that this latest endeavor will give my Hate Mail section a much needed shot in the arm. We’ll see what happens now won’t we?

All right Bob. Stop. I’m too excitable about all this right now. There’s more to talk about.
*Catches breath.*

There is, of course, another exciting year of Amazing Strangers at Union Square about to begin just as soon as the weather gets agreeable. Which reminds me – Shaggy is coming out with his own line of products this year too! His book, DEATH TO THE READERS, is available on Amazon for just $3, and available in print very soon. There’s also going to be tee shirts too, which if you’re an observant follower you’ll see Shaggy’s been wearing it in some of the videos that’ve been posted recently.

I have a list of art projects I’m working my way through too. As they happen you can rest assured they will brought to your attention. This leads me to the next important update. My Latest Updates section of the site is being archived for good, and this spot here at normalbob.com is where all things related to all of my sites will be posted. IMPORTANT: If you have a subscription to the old Latest Updates page you’re going to have to resubscribe at this one. The old one is no longer operational. Nothing will change about the layout at normalbobsmith.com, but I’ve come to realize that the web does demand that I present a format more friendly & familiar to today’s first time visitors. And here we are.

So please, click the Subscribe button on the right and stay tuned for another fun year from me,
Your only true friend,
Normal Bob Smith.

The New Mohammed Dressup/magnets

It’s difficult for me to express just how excited I am about the new Mohammed Dressup game, and the magnets in production. For a while now I’ve been attempting to imagine what the perfect Mohammed Dressup game would look like. It took a while for the popularity of his name & image to catch up with us in the West. Now that it has, I think this is what everyone’s been waiting for.

Mohammed Magnets & Postcards
Mohammed Magnets and Postcards ($30)

Another devious idea, I thought, was to print great quantities of The Prophet’s image in the form of mailable postcards! I mean, what better way to share his image than by showing it to everyone along the US mail postal route on the way to its lucky recipient? And you can send postcards cheap, just about anywhere, with no return address! I dunno. Maybe I’m the only one who appreciates it. We’ll see.

Either way, I don’t think I’ll find any stores willing to carry these on their shelves, so magnetic Mohammed Dressup is for sale here, and here alone. Shipment I’m predicting will arrive in April. I cannot wait.

Hate for the Holidays

“What if I were a Muslim, and someone made fun of Allah or Mohammed? How would I feel then?”

That question, and many others get answered in this weeks very special page of Hate Mail.

“Let’s say you were a f@#%*!g muslim, what about if I put up a website where I degrade that allah or mahomet… Would you like to see that…?”

Hi “Mr. Bob Smith” (if that is indeed your real name),

If you thought that dressing up like Satan and selling T-shirts, magnets and gadgets with this highly controversial theme would make you stand out of the crowd, you’ve succeeded. Too bad for yourself that we live in an age in which we should all be “politically correct”  yet there are websites like yours that are really distasteful and highly offensive to ALL christians.

I don’t know what religion you are (if you have one), and I don’t care, what I want to tell you is that your webpage is outrageously disgusting, distasteful, and offensive to millions of people in the world (not only in America)!

Let’s say you were a f@#%*!g muslim, what about if I put up a website where I degrade that allah or mahomet of yours, like you do on your website? Would you like to see that there is a popular website with your religious leader ridiculed in such a way?

I don’t think so, and if you would like it, it would show to all how sick and perverted you are.

You will do all of us a favor if you take down this website and stop your hate-spree.

I am positively ashamed that on this great thing called earth there are beings like you that instill anger, hate and extremely negative things in otherwise good and really normal people that are all geared toward yourself and guys like you! Are you some kind of sadomasochist?

There is no space for you and the likes of you on this earth!

Do yourself a favor, take the bloody f@#%*!g website down, and NEVER write or post anything like this again!

Marco Francesco Mario Guandalini

Imagine if I were a Muslim? That’s your retort? Had you thought maybe you deserve to have your god mocked if it’s led you to a place where you’re defending him by asking hecklers to imagine what it’s like? I think I used that same argument on my older brother while he made me hit myself in the head with my own hand.I’d scream at him, “Imagine if my head were a pot of gold! Ouch! And every time you made me hit it, Ouch! some gold fell out and was lost forever! Ouch, god-dangit!! Would you like that?!?!”

Marco Francesco Mario Guandalini, I regret to inform you that my line of protest had the complete opposite effect on my brother. And if I were in your shoes right now, I’d start thinking that perhaps I hadn’t been properly suited up for the show of life, and maybe, unconsciously I was leaving myself an open target to further ridicule in the not so distant future, and my fumbles were being recorded for future generations to giggle and titter to.

Imagine this, Marco. Imagine you were instead a thinking, rational adult with the ability to visualize himself in someone else’s shoes trying to understand how one could believe in magical gods who coincidentally lorded over the religion he was accidentally born into. Imagine having inner-arguments with yourself this complicated and working it out in your head before it ever got typed into an email and the “Send Message” button clicked.

In case you haven’t figured it out yet, Marco, I am the teasing big brother in the analogy, and you and Jesus are the stinky, turd-bottomed little brothers trapped in the garbage can that I sit atop. I’m making you hit yourselves with your own hands while I ignore your pleas for mercy and scoff your attempts to instill guilt. Why do I do these things, you ask? Easy. Because I love you, Marco.

Just kidding.

It’s because it’s hilarious and makes me feel like a big man.

Thanks for the email. I hope to hear back.

Normal Bob

Marco blocked me from emailing him back, and his Facebook page is private,

so my response was never received by him.

 

“Allah God will purnish u”

Insha Allah God will purnish u stupid man

Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

muminu.musa@yahoo.com

Yes, Allah is a very big and powerful brute. I am well impressed by his might.Please pass that on. I know my flattery of the magic powers he has in the spiritual realm mean a lot to him.

Normal Bob

 

“I used to basically be an atheist.”

Subject: Offensive material

Dear Normal Bob Smith,

Many of the things that you have posted on your websites are spiritually offensive.  The Halloween Jesus Dress Up! makes Jesus a joke (the first thing I saw of yours). Then I realized that you have a lot of offensive material against God, religions, and spiritually.  I request that you remove all of the religiously and spiritually offensive material from all of your websites, stop selling religiously and spiritually offensive material, and apologize for doing all of this.

I used to basically be an atheist.  But, I did not go around selling anti-spiritual and religious products and putting down good religious and spiritual people (I admit, I may have done so at some point in the past, which I now regret).  There is a difference between a good debate and offensive material.

Thank you,

Andrew Pankow

Oh, that’s sweet. You were offended, therefore it needs to be gone. That which offends you must be removed from public viewing. It really is adorable that you think emailing your personal complaints about stuff on the internet is still a thing someone does. There’s just too much stuff on the internet, huh? Some of it needs to go.”Basically an atheist?” What’s that? You sorta didn’t believe in any gods except for one, and for that one you had a stretch you stopped believing out of spite? That’s what I’ve come to understand most believers tout as “once being atheist.” – As a teen, God was something included in with your rebellion against the parents, or whatever authority figures you had to rebel against at the time, so that’s the time you were atheist. Basically.

How about this? I’m offended that you believe your wrongs can be taken on by an innocent, and the handoff of your mistakes to him relieves you of them, all available at your convenience? I request that you remove that from something you ever voice publicly. I find it offensive.

There. Let the war of the arms-folded-frowny-faced offended begin!

We are all made of stars.

Normal Bob

“I do not believe that.”

I did not used to believe in God.  Although surrender to God is good, I am not really sure what you mean by “I’m offended that you believe your wrongs can be taken on by an innocent.”  If you are saying that my wrongs can be put on the innocent, I do not believe that.

Thank you,

Andrew Pankow

Oh, sorry. I misunderstood. I assumed that you believed Jesus (an innocent) saved you from your sins and such. Sometimes I jump the gun on responses because the complaints have a standard protocol. My mistake.Please tell me more about your beliefs so I can find something to be offended by in them.

Thank you.

Normal Bob

 

“Delete the site”

Subject: Dude this is bad news.

Delete the site for your own inner peace.

Alex Green

No thank you. If I had any more inner peace than I’ve already got I’d be dead.Normal Bob